Illusions

The best kind of sexy is effortless, or at least seemingly so.  An outfit that is simplistic to the eye yet offers a hint of flirtation—a little bit of leg, an exposed shoulder, some casual cleavage—is so appealing. The outfit, or more importantly the woman wearing it, isn’t trying to hard, yet she exudes sexiness. The outfit offers a glimpse, but doesn’t shove it in your face.  (Don’t get me wrong: I’m all for a fierce pair of heels, a mini-dress and a push-up bra. But I can’t, and shouldn’t, always be that girl. That outfit has a time and a place.)

Clare Tough

Effortlessly sexy carries a quiet confidence. The wearer appears utterly at ease with herself, almost as if she wasn’t wearing any clothes at all.  Coco Chanel said, “A woman is closest to being naked when she is well dressed.”  This confidence only adds to the allure of the woman, the outfit.

MK at Matthew Williamson for H&M launch

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Any woman who knows anything about fashion knows that to appear effortless requires effort. It takes great skill and knowledge of what looks great on your body to achieve such a look. More than that though, sometimes it requires a sacrifice of practicality. 

I wear boots often, and with boots, I wear socks.  Since I don’t wear socks on a regular basis, my socks are, well, somewhat embarrassing.  I don’t want anyone to see these socks.  And no one does usually because they’re buried in my boots.  Yet, what about those times when I need to take my boots off, say, on a date? Taking off my socks while undressing (and having lovely little sock lines) isn’t sexy to me.  If I see them, my illusion of effortlessly sexy becomes fractured, perhaps it’s only a hairline fracture that my date doesn’t even notice or mind, but I notice it.

Moccasins are another item that remind me of the effort that goes into my outfit.  I wear my knee-high lace-up moccasins often in the summertime with easy summer dresses and these combinations make me feel comfortable and pretty simultaneously.  The moccasins, however, take at least five minutes of unlacing and pulling, forcefully I might add. On early dates, I have ruled them out completely. 

I have a vague recollection of an article I read in Vogue last year in which the author stated something to the effect that her ideal man needed to be willing to help her out of her Spring 2008 Balenciage knee-high gladiator sandals (which is apparently a 45-minute endeavor).  And while she has a point, I will sacrifice some of that practicality (socks), or impracticality if the case may be (moccasins), in order to maintain the illusion of effortlessly sexy.  But then again, if I feel sexy, even if I'm sacrificing a bit of comfort, then I can exude it.